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White House Ordering giant quantities of Paper Shredders

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The White House is alleged to be ordering giant quantities of paper shredders and burn barrels, because it seems probably that Donald Trump won’t win re-election. According to a supply throughout the Administration, who spoke off the report, ventilators initially supposed for the combat in opposition to Covid-19 are being re-manufactured as industrial grade paper shredders.

“This is being treated as a no-bid contract with vendors who have security clearances,” stated the high-ranking authorities official. “Because of the sensitive nature of the project, the vendors are charging hundreds of thousands of dollars per unit with no questions asked.”

The official went on to say that “the suppliers are trying to justify the inflated cost by claiming the shredders can handle paper of any color, pages that are printed on two sides and inserted upside down or sideways. It’s all bullshit.”

There has additionally reportedly been a gentle supply of so known as ‘burn barrels’ which might be getting used to incinerate pc hard drives, mobile telephones, capsule bottles and different items. Some members of the White House panorama crew have reported that they’ve been instructed by administration officers to “burn the hell out of whatever we bring to you.”

One of the crew member said, “They have us roll out these barrels out back by the rear service entrance. As soon as the sun goes down, we’re firing up. I’m not so sure it’s legal, but the overtime is pretty good.”

When requested concerning the potentialities of the wholesale destruction of authorities property, a White House spokesperson known as the accusations “fake news”. She went on to say: “Our duty to the American people includes the safe keeping of sensitive materials. In some cases, the president may decide that their existence is a threat to national security.”

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